Fidonet Portal






From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Mon, 19.10.20 02:07
A Crappy Sales Call
A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be
confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes
of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered
vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!" and she proceeded
to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it
wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen
my demonstration."

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from
your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

"Well," she said, "I hope you've got a good appetite because the electricity
was cut off this morning."
--- SBBSecho 3.11-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - tbolt.synchro.net (1:19/33)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Sun, 20.06.21 14:54
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be
> confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

> "Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes
> of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered
> vacuum cleaners."

> "Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money!" and she proceeded
> to close the door.

> Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it
> wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least
seen
> my demonstration."

> And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway
carpet.

> "If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure
from
> your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

> "Well," she said, "I hope you've got a good appetite because the
electricity
> was cut off this morning."

Now you're telling potty jokes? Bathroom humour? For shame!

Why did the US invade the toilet?
Because it had oil in it.
T-oil-et.

Q: What happens if you miss the toilet while trying to take a pee?
A: Urine trouble.

I was sick and tired of my wife forgetfully leaving her feminine hygiene
products in the toilet, so I confronted her
She immediately flushed with embarrassment.




Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Sun, 20.06.21 22:11
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
George,

GP> Now you're telling potty jokes? Bathroom humour? For shame!

Well, we all have to go sometime. <G>

GP> Why did the US invade the toilet?
GP> Because it had oil in it.
GP> T-oil-et.

I saw a meme where a toilet was telling someone to drop their pants,
and pour everything into it. I'd have to dig for it, as I don't have it
offhand.

GP> Q: What happens if you miss the toilet while trying to take a pee?
GP> A: Urine trouble.

We Aim To Please...You Aim, Too...Please.

GP> I was sick and tired of my wife forgetfully leaving her feminine
GP> hygiene products in the toilet, so I confronted her
GP> She immediately flushed with embarrassment.

That was a bloody mess. Razz




If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?? - George Carlin

Daryl

... When my son said "Stop impersonating a flamingo", I put my foot down.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Wed, 23.06.21 10:43
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> I saw a meme where a toilet was telling someone to drop their pants,
> and pour everything into it. I'd have to dig for it, as I don't have it
> offhand.

You'd prolly have to explain it to me, too. . . ;)

> GP> Q: What happens if you miss the toilet while trying to take a pee?
> GP> A: Urine trouble.

> We Aim To Please...You Aim, Too...Please.

Another sign:
Ladies: Please stay eated during the entire poerformance.
Men: Stand close, t's shorter than you think.

& another:

If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie & wipe the seatie.

Now he common sign is "Do not put anything but tissue into the toilet"

Okay, so where do I put the reason I need to sit down, once produced?

> If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2?? - George Carlin

good old Carlin(RIP), one of my all-time favorites -- he was funny AND
thought-provoking AND intelligent/witty.

* Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are
stupider than that.

accept.
* Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the
roof and gets stuck.

RIP, Georgie, you were one of the good ones!

I thik I have every album he's done, in MP3 format, plus I've read both his
books (funny stuff)

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You
cannot post "Thou shalt not steal," "Thou shalt not commit adultery," and
"Thou shalt not lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians.
It creates a hostile work environment. --20th c. Philosopher G. Carlin


Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Wed, 23.06.21 22:06
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
George,

GP> You'd prolly have to explain it to me, too. . . ;)

It's on the BBS computer on the LAN...I was reworking the file areas.

GP> Another sign:
GP> Ladies: Please stay eated during the entire poerformance.

I hope you meant "stay seated".

GP> Men: Stand close, t's shorter than you think.

I hope you meant "it's shorter than you think".

Or like the guy who had his lady friend's name tattooed on his
member, but at first, all you saw was W and Y -- for Wendy. Well,
another guy had the same deal, but it was "Welcome To Jamaica.
Have A Nice Day". Razz Considering what one has to go through for
a tattoo, I've got better things to spend my money on.

GP> If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie & wipe the seatie.

Exactly.

GP> Now he common sign is "Do not put anything but tissue into the toilet"

GP> Okay, so where do I put the reason I need to sit down, once produced?

You'd be surprised at the stuff people try to put down the toilet.

GP> good old Carlin(RIP), one of my all-time favorites -- he was funny AND
GP> thought-provoking AND intelligent/witty.

Never mind the 7 dirty words.

GP> * Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them
GP> are stupider than that.

On my train of thought, 95% are riding for half fare.


GP> I accept.

I talk to myself when I need expert advice.

GP> * Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up
GP> on the roof and gets stuck.

I've seen a variant of that in a QWK Mail tagline.

GP> RIP, Georgie, you were one of the good ones!

I wish many of the comedians nowadays hadn't gotten so raunchy with
their material. The long gone comedians of Red Skelton, Jack Benny,
George Burns, Groucho Marx, and many others...proved that you don't
have to be dirty or vulgar to be funny.

Along that line, ventriloquist Jeff Dunham got pretty raunchy at
times, because "it was an economical issue". Well, I know that two
other ventriloquists, Todd Oliver and Darci Lynn Farmer, have G rated
shows.

GP> The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a
GP> courthouse: You cannot post "Thou shalt not steal," "Thou shalt not
GP> commit adultery," and "Thou shalt not lie" in a building full of
GP> lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work
GP> environment. --20th c. Philosopher G. Carlin

He hit the nail on the head.

Daryl

... What you think of me is none of my business.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Fri, 25.06.21 11:45
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> GP> Another sign:
> GP> Ladies: Please stay eated during the entire poerformance.

> I hope you meant "stay seated".

Kinda yeah. . .

People do take their lunch into the toilet,. to have privacy while they eat &
play Candy Crush or check Facebook. .

No thank you. . .

> Or like the guy who had his lady friend's name tattooed on his
> member, but at first, all you saw was W and Y -- for Wendy. Well,
> another guy had the same deal, but it was "Welcome To Jamaica.
> Have A Nice Day". Razz Considering what one has to go through for
> a tattoo, I've got better things to spend my money on.

One guy was asked why he tattooed "LITTLE" on his member. He said, "Just
wait a minute -- it spells "I'm from Little Rock, Arkansas, United States of
America"

> GP> Now he common sign is "Do not put anything but tissue into the
toilet"

> GP> Okay, so where do I put the reason I need to sit down, once produced?

> You'd be surprised at the stuff people try to put down the toilet.

I doubt I would be. . .

> GP> good old Carlin(RIP), one of my all-time favorites -- he was funny
AND
> GP> thought-provoking AND intelligent/witty.

> Never mind the 7 dirty words.

I found it funny intelligent, & witty. . .

He demonstrates that words in & of themseloves are not "bad"; bad intentions
& misuses are bad. . .


> I wish many of the comedians nowadays hadn't gotten so raunchy with
> their material. The long gone comedians of Red Skelton, Jack Benny,
> George Burns, Groucho Marx, and many others...proved that you don't
> have to be dirty or vulgar to be funny.

I like both - but it hasd t be intelligent, not JUST relying on shock value

I'm no afraid of words -- they indicate what's going on behind the mouth
sdaying them. . .

Same with people's choice of attire or tattoos.

If God gave all of us free will, who are we to try to override it?

I'm all for givibng advice ("talking like that won't get you as far in this
world as being polite & slightly formal")

> Along that line, ventriloquist Jeff Dunham got pretty raunchy at
> times, because "it was an economical issue". Well, I know that two
> other ventriloquists, Todd Oliver and Darci Lynn Farmer, have G rated
> shows.

I have every one of Dunham's shows; not sure I recall anything 'raunchy'

> ... What you think of me is none of my business.

People have no clue on how to "mind your own business" any more. . .

Like don't start talking trash about someone else to me because true or not,
I dn't want to hear it!

Plus, I figured out that if Buddy is trashing X to you, he's trashing you to
X. . .

You hear the gossip about butter?


Q: What do they call gossip you hear in bathrooms?
A: Restrumors.

I heard some salacious gossip about the prime minister of Canada
I don't think it's Trudeau

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: Mike Powell (1:2320/105)
To: All
Date: Fri, 25.06.21 18:01
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> People do take their lunch into the toilet,. to have privacy while they eat &
> play Candy Crush or check Facebook. .

> No thank you. . .

Agreed. I have heard that some of my co-workers at a place I used to work
would do that, but I never witnessed it. Yuck!

Mike


* SLMR 2.1a * Blue Wave Tagline makers can DO IT l o n g e r .
--- SBBSecho 3.12-Linux
* Origin: capitolcityonline.net * Telnet/SSH:2022/HTTP (1:2320/105)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Fri, 25.06.21 19:13
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
George,

> I hope you meant "stay seated".

GP> Kinda yeah. . .

I hate fat finger syndrome...but without fat fingers, how do you
pick up the food and the silverware??

GP> People do take their lunch into the toilet,. to have privacy while they
GP> eat & play Candy Crush or check Facebook. .

I'd be afraid of dropping the phone into the toilet. I admit I take
mine in the bathroom at home, but it sits on the chair next to me.

I keep deleting Candy Crush and other stuff off the computer, but
Windows keeps putting it back on. Speaking of which, the Lenovo
laptop will be able to upgrade to Windows 11, but the BBS computer
apparently will not...as it's CPU is too slow. The thing is, even
if the CPU was faster, if they aren't going to make a 32-bit version
of Windows 11, the BBS will stay with Windows 10.

GP> One guy was asked why he tattooed "LITTLE" on his member. He said,
GP> "Just wait a minute -- it spells "I'm from Little Rock, Arkansas,
GP> United States of America"

It wasn't me. <G> Remember, if you mix Viagra with Bounty, you have
"The Quicker Pecker Upper". <G>

GP> I like both - but it hasd t be intelligent, not JUST relying on shock
GP> value

Just ask Howard Stern.

GP> I'm no afraid of words -- they indicate what's going on behind the
GP> mouth sdaying them. . .

To me, profanity is the attempt of a feeble mind to express itself
forcibly...especially if it's constant in their speech. Once in a
blue moon, I can deal with it.

GP> If God gave all of us free will, who are we to try to override it?

You'd be surprised how many try to, anyway. Man wants to be "his own
god".

GP> I have every one of Dunham's shows; not sure I recall anything
GP> 'raunchy'

I've heard him use the F word on occasion. The 2 I recall are:

1) When Achmed meets his son.
2) When Peanut calls the "Taste Of China" restaurant for food.

> ... What you think of me is none of my business.

GP> People have no clue on how to "mind your own business" any more. . .

There was a song "Why Don't You Mind Your Own Business, So You Won't
Be Minding Mine??".

GP> You hear the gossip about butter?


Did you talk to Marge Erin about that??

GP> Q: What do they call gossip you hear in bathrooms?
GP> A: Restrumors.

That's the scuttlebutt on the new toilets.

GP> I heard some salacious gossip about the prime minister of Canada
GP> I don't think it's Trudeau

I guess it petered out, then??

Daryl

... "I never forget a face. In your case, I'll make an exception". -Groucho
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Sun, 27.06.21 15:23
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> > People do take their lunch into the toilet,. to have privacy while they
> > eat & play Candy Crush or check Facebook. .

> > No thank you. . .

> Agreed. I have heard that some of my co-workers at a place I used to work
> would do that, but I never witnessed it. Yuck!

Art my last in-person working place (I(& my team) converted the company to
fully virtual, so the boss saves on the expensive downtown lease & I save on a
4 hour/day unpaid commute. . .Wink

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Sun, 27.06.21 16:01
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> George,

> > I hope you meant "stay seated".

> GP> Kinda yeah. . .

> I hate fat finger syndrome...but without fat fingers, how do you
> pick up the food and the silverware??

My fingers fit perfectly on the ends of my hands. . . It's not my fault that
manufacturers tend to think we all have Asian teen girl fingers for using
mobile apps!

> I'd be afraid of dropping the phone into the toilet. I admit I take
> mine in the bathroom at home, but it sits on the chair next to me.

I only do so at home & I'm very very careful. . .

> I keep deleting Candy Crush and other stuff off the computer, but
> Windows keeps putting it back on. Speaking of which, the Lenovo
> laptop will be able to upgrade to Windows 11, but the BBS computer
> apparently will not...as it's CPU is too slow. The thing is, even
> if the CPU was faster, if they aren't going to make a 32-bit version
> of Windows 11, the BBS will stay with Windows 10.

They've issued Win11?! Is it actually iuseful/better? Is it free?

> GP> I like both - but it hasd t be intelligent, not JUST relying on shock
> GP> value

> Just ask Howard Stern.

Never heard one of his shows -- no need, I've got the gist. . .

> GP> I'm no afraid of words -- they indicate what's going on behind the
> GP> mouth sdaying them. . .

> To me, profanity is the attempt of a feeble mind to express itself
> forcibly...especially if it's constant in their speech. Once in a
> blue moon, I can deal with it.

Often it's not their fault; they were deprived of a decent education, so as
to have a full vocabulary.

The peroblem with slang(vulgar & otherwise) is it's lazy. . .

I use fleep & fleeping, which I've defined as a "neutral gratuitious
intensive."



> GP> If God gave all of us free will, who are we to try to override it?

> You'd be surprised how many try to, anyway. Man wants to be "his own
> god".

> GP> I have every one of Dunham's shows; not sure I recall anything
> GP> 'raunchy'

> I've heard him use the F word on occasion. The 2 I recall are:

> 1) When Achmed meets his son.
> 2) When Peanut calls the "Taste Of China" restaurant for food.

> > ... What you think of me is none of my business.

> GP> People have no clue on how to "mind your own business" any more. . .

> There was a song "Why Don't You Mind Your Own Business, So You Won't
> Be Minding Mine??".

> GP> You hear the gossip about butter?


> Did you talk to Marge Erin about that??

> GP> Q: What do they call gossip you hear in bathrooms?
> GP> A: Restrumors.

> That's the scuttlebutt on the new toilets.

> GP> I heard some salacious gossip about the prime minister of Canada
> GP> I don't think it's Trudeau

> I guess it petered out, then??

> Daryl

> ... "I never forget a face. In your case, I'll make an exception". -
Groucho
> === MultiMail/Win v0.52
> --- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
> * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Sun, 27.06.21 19:25
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
George,

GP> They've issued Win11?! Is it actually iuseful/better? Is it free?

I don't know...but for users of Windows 10, it'll be free. My Lenovo
Windows 10 64-bit laptop will take the upgrade...but the CPU on the BBS
computer is too slow to run with it. So, I doubt it'll get upgraded,
unless they come out with a 32-bit version. I think the upgrades will
start rolling out in October.

Daryl

... Archaeologist: A person whose career lies in ruins.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: Ron Lauzon (1:275/89)
To: All
Date: Mon, 28.06.21 10:34
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
-=> Daryl Stout wrote to George Pope <=-

DS> I don't know...but for users of Windows 10, it'll be free.

Anything you get for free it worth what you paid for it.


... A little greed can get you lots of stuff
=== MultiMail/Linux v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: Diamond Mine Online BBS - bbs.dmine.net:24 (1:275/89)

From: Mike Powell (1:2320/105)
To: All
Date: Mon, 28.06.21 17:46
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> > Agreed. I have heard that some of my co-workers at a place I used to work
> > would do that, but I never witnessed it. Yuck!

> Art my last in-person working place (I(& my team) converted the company to
> fully virtual, so the boss saves on the expensive downtown lease & I save on
a
> 4 hour/day unpaid commute. . .Wink

With what happened during COVID (we all were put on remote and it worked,
even though management was originally skeptical), I was hoping we might
remain virtual. While they have not completely made their minds up yet, it
sounds like we are not. We may get to work remote 2 or so days a week, or
maybe only have to report in 2 or so days a pay-period, but nothing is
really solid yet. I think they are waiting for one of us to submit our
request so that they can say "that is not acceptable" rather than tell us
what is acceptable. Smile

Mike

* SLMR 2.1a * So it goes so it goes so it goes so it goes so...
--- SBBSecho 3.12-Linux
* Origin: capitolcityonline.net * Telnet/SSH:2022/HTTP (1:2320/105)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Tue, 29.06.21 10:19
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> With what happened during COVID (we all were put on remote and it worked,
> even though management was originally skeptical), I was hoping we might
> remain virtual. While they have not completely made their minds up yet,
it
> sounds like we are not. We may get to work remote 2 or so days a week, or
> maybe only have to report in 2 or so days a pay-period, but nothing is
> really solid yet. I think they are waiting for one of us to submit our
> request so that they can say "that is not acceptable" rather than tell us
> what is acceptable. Smile

Figure out who scammed the company during the covid work-from-home period,
then figure out how to prevent that gaming of things, present to your boss &
you may get back on virtual. . .

Basically relieve yor boss' concerns about paying money for nothing, & he'll
happily go 100% virtual -- it's like free money for him!

hmm. . .need funny content as the above is sad more than funny. . .

Of course, our company's work type leaves it obvious who;'s slackassing & who
isn't. If anincoming call isn't answered by on duty staff, it follows up t
ring my boss' mobile (he does not like it when people are paid to answer but
HE gets woken up at 2am to take care of a problem.Wink

Simple to set up a soft phone system that logs all calls with timestamps.

& create a database/log of all work done. (easily spot-checked by management
or owners)

Our system is so much more efficient -- we can respond to emergences
immediately, instead of making our way to the office first.

If a customer overhears dog or baby in the background, I just said, "I saw
your name in the query list and didn't want to ake you wait, so I'm taking
car of this from home right away."

Bingo, blammo. Big boost to our business!

Because every customer I'm talking to is a VIP, & they feel like it, too.

I may never leave my house to work again! (working on prspectusing a new
division for me to be VP of)

I recall in the '80s there was all this talk of telecommuting, but nothing
came of it because. . .paranoid business owners.

Now many are figuring out the're paying a buttload of overhead on a physical
office for nothing. . . Boss can hub the Zooms from his own home (tax-
deductible region in his home)






First Day as a Bartender



this...


Cop: You are the lawyer.



Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: George Pope (1:153/757.2)
To: All
Date: Tue, 29.06.21 10:36
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> George,

> GP> They've issued Win11?! Is it actually iuseful/better? Is it free?

> I don't know...but for users of Windows 10, it'll be free. My Lenovo
> Windows 10 64-bit laptop will take the upgrade...but the CPU on the BBS
> computer is too slow to run with it. So, I doubt it'll get upgraded,
> unless they come out with a 32-bit version. I think the upgrades will
> start rolling out in October.

So it's strictly 64bit now? I use 64bit Win10 (they forced the 'upgrade' on
me one night when I was asleep)

My wife told me she'd leave me if I don't stop making Microsoft puns, and I
need some advice
I immediately left my Office and tried explaining myself. Sure, on the
Surface I do it often, but I think it Works. It's not just about Word play,
either; my Outlook on life helps me Excel. She and I have such a great Team
Foundation, I Azure you. I wanted to Exchange my thoughts with her, so we
could work with OneDrive. I looked her right in the Windows of her soul, to
Access the deepest parts of her heart, and told her I loved her. Completely
on Edge, I awaited her answer...

PowerPoint of the story is: does anyone know of a good divorce lawyer?

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

From: Mike Powell (1:2320/105)
To: All
Date: Tue, 29.06.21 17:47
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> My boss, on Friday: .This is the fifth day in a row that you.ve been late..
> Me: .Well, I can promise it won.t happen tomorrow..

Indeed!

> First Day as a Bartender
> Customer: I.ll have a martini, dry.

> Me, staring at all the liquid ingredients: I don.t know how to tell you
> this...

That one always used to throw me, too. How can a liquid be "dry"? Very Happy

Mike


* SLMR 2.1a * THUGS EAT THEN ROB PROPRIETOR
--- SBBSecho 3.12-Linux
* Origin: capitolcityonline.net * Telnet/SSH:2022/HTTP (1:2320/105)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Tue, 29.06.21 18:54
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
George,

GP> So it's strictly 64bit now? I use 64bit Win10 (they forced the
GP> 'upgrade' on me one night when I was asleep)

I don't know. I bought a 64-bit laptop with Windows 10 on it (a Lenovo
one from Best Buy), and that's what I use for stuff outside the BBS. I
ordered a copy of Windows 10 32-bit from Best Buy (it was cheaper than
from Microsoft), but I think the computers now require a faster CPU to
run Windows 11...and I don't know if it'll have 32-bit support or not.
I personally can NOT see discarding perfectly good working hardware and
software, just to satisfy Microsoft's bottom line.

GP> My wife told me she'd leave me if I don't stop making Microsoft puns,
GP> and I need some advice
GP> I immediately left my Office and tried explaining myself. Sure, on the
GP> Surface I do it often, but I think it Works. It's not just about Word
GP> play, either; my Outlook on life helps me Excel. She and I have such a
GP> great Team Foundation, I Azure you. I wanted to Exchange my thoughts
GP> with her, so we could work with OneDrive. I looked her right in the
GP> Windows of her soul, to Access the deepest parts of her heart, and told
GP> her I loved her. Completely on Edge, I awaited her answer...

That'd make a good deal for a pun contest. Smile

GP> PowerPoint of the story is: does anyone know of a good divorce lawyer?

Only have the case between May 3 and 5, so May The Fourth be with you. <G>

Daryl

... What do people in China call their good plates?
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: Daryl Stout (1:19/33)
To: All
Date: Wed, 30.06.21 00:58
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
Mike,

> First Day as a Bartender
> Customer: I.ll have a martini, dry.

> Me, staring at all the liquid ingredients: I don.t know how to tell you
> this...

MP> That one always used to throw me, too. How can a liquid be "dry"? Very Happy

If I'm not mistaken, in this case, dry means "bitter". I think of what
Groucho Marx would say "Pardon me while I slip out of these wet clothes,
and into a dry martini". I think the Looney Tunes used this quite a bit
with their cartoons...one had Bugs Bunny as Groucho, and Elmer Fudd as
Harpo. <G>

Daryl

... "Somebody left the cork out of my lunch." -W.C. Fields
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33)

From: Chris Hizny (1:218/860)
To: All
Date: Wed, 30.06.21 07:58
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
DS> > Customer: I.ll have a martini, dry.
DS> If I'm not mistaken, in this case, dry means "bitter". I think of what

I don't even know why I know this, except to the extent that I was once
confused by that term, too. A dry martini is a martini which has very little
vermouth added to it.

Found this:

Legend has it that Sir Winston Churchill liked his Martinis served without
the vermouth actually being added to the drink, just present in the same
room. He is quoted as saying of the drink, "Glance at the vermouth bottle
briefly while pouring the juniper distillate freely."
--- Mystic BBS v1.12 A46 2020/08/26 (Linux/64)
* Origin: Shipwrecks & Shibboleths [San Francisco, CA - USA] (1:218/860)

From: Mike Powell (1:2320/105)
To: All
Date: Wed, 30.06.21 17:35
Re: A Crappy Sales Call
> If I'm not mistaken, in this case, dry means "bitter". I think of what
> Groucho Marx would say "Pardon me while I slip out of these wet clothes,
> and into a dry martini". I think the Looney Tunes used this quite a bit
> with their cartoons...one had Bugs Bunny as Groucho, and Elmer Fudd as
> Harpo. <G>

I think it may also. The Looney Tunes/Merry Melodies used the Marx
Brothers more a few times to get a good laugh. Smile

Mike


* SLMR 2.1a * Music is the only sensual pleasure without vice.
--- SBBSecho 3.12-Linux
* Origin: capitolcityonline.net * Telnet/SSH:2022/HTTP (1:2320/105)

ABOUT

This forum contains echomail areas hosted on Nightmare BBS You can browse local echomail areas, italian fidonet areas and a selection of international fidonet areas, reading messages posted by users in Nightmare BBS or even other BBSs all over the world. You can find file areas too (functional to fidonet technology). You can browse echomail areas and download files with no registration, but if you want to write messages in echomail areas, or use fidonet netmail (private messages with fidomet technology), you have to register. Only a minimal set of data is required, functional to echomail and netmail usage (name, password, email); a registration and login with facebook is provided too, to allow easy registration. If you won't follow rules (each echomail areas has its own, regularly posted in the echomail), your account may be suspended;

CONTACT